Maybe
by mentalsunflower
Summary: Suki is back, and Toph tries to understand what she's feeling about Sokka... and what Sokka's feeling about Suki. Tokka


**A/N: **I love writing vulnerable Toph, because we so rarely get to see her! Love her. Love Tokka. Love Suki too though. Woes.

**Disclaimer: **Characters, etc etc not mine. Ho hum.

* * *

"Toph, this is Suki."

Toph doesn't shake her hand, doesn't lift her head to look at her face. After all, she doesn't need to. She takes a tiny, crawling, infinitesimal movement forward, and can feel her body through her feet: tall, lithe, built like Katara. Toph falls back, ducks her shoulders.

"Hi," she mumbles, because suddenly she feels like the tiniest of children beside what can only be described as a woman.

"Hi, Toph, was it?" she asks brightly. Toph wonders how she can be so cheerful after being in prison. Then again, she's with Sokka. Sokka and Suki. Suki and Sokka. Sounds perfect together.

"It's a pleasure to meet you," she continues, and even though Toph can hear Zuko and Katara talking softly in the background, with Aang and Katara's father jumping into their heated conversation on occasion, her ears are almost totally focussed on Suki's voice: high, sweet, totally trustworthy. Completely feminine.

Toph loves herself. She has rarely doubted herself before. This is a new feeling.

She doesn't like it.

"Nice to meet you," she finally squeaks, but doesn't know what else to do so she stands there awkwardly.

"Toph," Sokka mutters, elbowing her lightly. But he's taller than her so his elbow sort of awkwardly juts against her shoulder and she only stares at the ground. He wants her to be nicer, she knows. Or at least more… _normal_. But it's hard for her right now.

Later that night she's sitting at the fire, and it's the first time Katara has stepped away from her father that night. She's sitting beside Toph, humming softly as she puts little braids in Toph's hair. It's nice to have someone's fingers in her hair. She doesn't know how to describe the atmosphere at the moment, except maybe peaceful.

But then she hears Suki's soft giggle, Sokka's deeper chuckle, and her stomach curls. "Hey Katara," she begins, and Katara's humming stops. "Is Suki pretty?" she asks softly, mortified at her question. Katara waits before answering. She is still braiding.

"Yea. She's beautiful," she murmurs in a pleasant tone. Toph feels even more horrible for the biting envy inside of her.

Even later that night, she can't sleep and everyone else is already snoring lightly. Toph lays a palm to the stone floor and feels Sokka standing further off. She double and triple checks: Suki is lying asleep not far from Katara.

Silently Toph stands up and shuffles over to Sokka. "Can't sleep?" he asks quietly, and Toph can hear the evident happiness in his voice. Without her sight, she has had to learn to detect people's emotions in their voices. It's like second nature now.

"No." She falls silent, walking to sit at Sokka's feet, wrapping her arms around her legs, resting her chin on her little knees. "Too… hot?" She's not sure why she can't sleep. "Why can't you?" she whispers.

She can hear the grin in Sokka's voice. "Too excited," he replies, as if it is obvious.

"To have your dad back?"

"Yea. And… other things."

It doesn't take a genius to figure out what he means. Toph feels her cheeks heating up. Good thing it's pitch black so Sokka can't see them. Or can he? Toph isn't sure how darkness works for those that can normally see.

"Sokka?"

"Mm?"

She tugs at his boot, and he bends down obligingly so she doesn't have to speak so loudly. She can feel his breath beside her right ear; feel his fingers grazing her knee as he repositions himself in a squatting position. Toph hastily tries to remember what she wanted to say.

"Sokka, do you love Suki?" asks Toph bluntly, holding her breath, clenching her fingers tighter around her knees. She expects some sort of outrageous reply, some sort of screech and maybe a sarcastic crack or two. But all she gets is silence and that is far, far worse.

"Maybe," he replies, so quietly she can barely hear him. "I know I'm really happy to be with her again. If that's love…"

Toph doesn't say anything because she _knows _that's love, that's how she feels around Sokka, stupid twit! Is he that thick that he can't see how she feels about him?

"Maybe," she manages to choke out in the softest of agreements, and she feels Sokka's hand ruffling at her already unmanageable hair. Toph has so many questions. If she were as pretty as Suki, would he love her? If she kissed him, would he love her? If she went missing for many months and then was found again, would he love her? It seems too hard to accept, to think that Sokka's thoughts are drifting away from the immediate group of friends… it's almost impossible to comprehend.

"Well I think I might sleep," he whispers. She nods feebly.

"Don't go too far, 'kay?" she whispers, and he chuckles and agrees and lies down on the ground right there beside her, using his bag as a pillow as he drifts off into quiet slumber. But Toph knows she doesn't mean right now, she means in the future, when this is all done and Sokka might actually go away with Suki and away from Toph. Forever.

"Don't go too far," she says again, but he's already deep asleep and she's talking to nobody.


End file.
